The Straight Poop on Potty Humour

I believe very strongly in teaching my kids to use appropriate behaviour and language at all times. There is no room in Team Pickles for potty humour and poop jokes, and if my children veer into bathroom humour territory, I gently admonish them and remind them that

What do you mean, no-one’s buying it? I’ll have you know that we don’t stand for that sort of…

All right, fine. Maybe I’m not as consistent as I perhaps should be on the whole potty humour thing…but y’know…sometimes…shtuff happens.

Straight Poop

The Straight Poop on Potty Humour
(Or, I think my credibility just went down the toilet)

Yesterday when Ben declared that he was about to have his third (3rd!!) poop of the day, I foolishly led us down the rabbit hole of poop jokes (my apologies, Ben’s teachers!). It started out so innocently:

“Ben, you’re the poopiest guy I’ve  ever seen! I have never heard of anyone pooping as much as you! You’re like the pooper of all poopers. If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Poopasaurus Rex!!”

*giggle giggle giggle *

“If you were a tropical fish, you’d be a pooping tetra!”

*giggle giggle giggle *

“If you were a lunch, you’d be…pooperoni and cheese!!”

*giggle giggle giggle *

“If you were a breakfast you’d be cereal with poopghurt!!”


“If you were a dinner, you’d be spaghetti and poopballs!!”

“If I were a book, I’d be I Have To Go POOP!!”

“If you were a Dr. SEUSS book you’d be The Cat in the Hat Goes Poop! Or Horton Hears a Poop!”

“Yeah! And it would be by Dr. POOPS!”

“If you were a Treehouse show, you’d be Franklin and Poops!!

“Or Thomas the Tank Engine and Poops! And if I were a Disney Junior show, I’d be Stella and Poop!”

“If you were a song, you’d be I Knew You Were Poopy When You Walked In.

“If you were a breakfast cereal, you’d be Froot Poops!”

“If I was in a band I’d be a poopcussionist!!”

“If you were a musical instrument, you’d be a poop organ!!”

“Or I’d play the BAGPOOPS!!!”

“If you were a pizza topping, you’d be…”


*total collapse*



Sorry, mom…


~ karyn

3 thoughts on “The Straight Poop on Potty Humour

  1. I read your opener after you mentioned “great minds” and my heart fell to my feet. I’m so happy you followed with something a little more reassuring about my love of potty jokes.

    Also? I totally do poo puns with my son. I know kindergarten will produce at least one phone call about it.

  2. Lol…I could hardly even type that first paragraph out! Isn’t part of the joy of having kids the fact that we can get out all of our potty humour without having to worry about HR complaints? Poo puns all the way!

  3. Mostly, I hate potty humor. But sometimes I just can’t contain the grin when my girls are doubled-over with laughter because the 3yo Class Clown in our family has just announced she has poop eyeballs.
    Good for you for being such a fun mom!

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